Tell the Truth to Power

By Neil Tepper -

Roger Federer is considered by many as the best tennis player of our time. Judging by the records he holds, the money he’s won and the respect he’s earned, no one is a better overall player than Roger Federer. And, Roger Federer has a coach.

Why would the best tennis player in the world – or any top athlete – need a coach?  The answer is simple: because he can’t see his own swing. In fact, a coach in golf is called a “swing coach.”

Each of us has our own, unique swing: our talents and expertise; our physical presence; our personality; our spiritual being. Each of us brings this package of who we are to our jobs, to our relationships and to how we approach every aspect of our lives.

Yet, regardless of our strengths and accomplishments, each of us has a blind side that prevents us from seeing our own swing.

People who want to excel in life know this. That’s why personal improvement books and websites are so popular. No doubt, that’s why we’re meeting here at The Self Improvement Blog.

Corporate leaders also know this. That’s why the smartest and most determined of them gather accomplished people around them, so there is no part of the organization’s “business swing” that remains unseen.

In my role as a business and creativity coach, I work with “C” level executives and other people in leadership roles to help them improve their “swing.” This select group is serious about their work. They can often intimidate outsiders who don’t understand the rules of power.

People in such exalted positions don’t usually like to be corrected or hear the word “no.” But, these powerful, super-achievers know they need to be disagreed with and challenged.

Indeed, the strongest and brightest leaders seek diverging perspectives from people who are not afraid to “tell the truth to power.” They need – and are grateful for –  the truth. As one of my clients said to me after I gave him feedback on a presentation he was going to make to the Board of Directors of The Coca-Cola Company, “Thank you for pushing me to be my best.”

If you want to operate at your own highest level, you need to tell the truth to powerful people. And, you need to want to hear the truth from others. Sometimes, it’s uncomfortable to do either. But as long as you hold back from it, you are not serving your superiors and colleagues – and you are impeding your own advancement to success.

Ultimately, the most important person you will ever need to tell the truth to is yourself. If you can say it – and hear it – you will be much more effective in your work life and happier in the whole of your life.

You will say to yourself or to your coach: “Thank you for pushing me to be my best.”

About: Neil:
Neil Tepper is a creativity coach, inspirational speaker, author and award-winning photographer. As “The Creativity Doctor,” Neil helps individuals and organizations to harness their right-brain creativity and put innovative ideas into action. Neil’s new book, “Prescriptions for Living a Creative Life: Simple Remedies for Common Maladies in Our 24/7 World,” offers tools to help readers solve the common challenges we all face in our fast-paced world. “Prescriptions” includes practical workbook pages in each chapter that will help you solve problems and achieve your goals. Connect with Neil at neiltepper.com and on Facebook.

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Power through the people

Have you come across a person who is so naturally friendly that when you put him inside a room of strangers, he'll be friends with almost everyone in no time? We call such a people-person, someone unbelievably nice and charismatic that he can charm anyone into doing anything.

A socially-empowered person achieves so much greatness, basically because of the people that catapult him to success. He earns the trust and all-out support of the people, whom he had helped before. He never runs out of help. He can do anything with the plethora of people behind him. All because he knows he maximizes his social potential!

See, if you know your social skills and you make use of them, you will reach self-empowerment. Self-empowerment is making a general overhaul in your life and turning yourself into a happier and more successful person.If you can be one of those people-persons, then I can't see any reason why you will not succeed. You just have to know how to start.

1. Be genuine.

Hypocrisy will just bring you all the way down. Be genuinely nice and interested to people. Once they perceive that you are Mr. Hypocrite with selfish intentions, you might as well say goodbye to self-empowerment.

2. Be the greatest listener that you can be.

To earn the love and trust of the people, listen to their problems and sympathize with them. Do not just hear them out, listen to them with your heart. Make eye contact when the person talks to you. Listen as if every word matters, and it does. Brownie points when they find out that there is a confidante in you.

3. Laugh out loud.

I do not mean that you force yourself to laugh for every joke cracked by someone, albeit you do not find it funny at all.This means finding humor in things and not being too darn serious. A person oozing with an awesome sense of humor attracts crowds and eventually, attracts success.

4. Don't forget yourself.

In the process of fluttering around like a social butterfly, you might forget yourself, allowing everyone to push you over. Remember, love and value yourself before anyone else. If you deem yourself respectable and worthy of affection, people will flock to you and not trample on you.

5. Do random acts of kindness.

You don't have to do a John Rockefeller and blow your savings to charity. Little acts of kindness matters the most, and this can be as simple as giving someone a surprise you-take-care card or helping an elderly cross the street. When we were kindergarten students, kindness was taught to us and greatly practiced. Now is the time to revive the good deeds and this time, let them stay for good.

6. Contact your old friends.

Sad how some friendships are destined to goodbye, but thanks to technology, you can do something about it. Relive the good old days by flipping your yearbook and look for the great people whom you want to communicate with again. Adding these old friends to your roster of support peers will surely make you feel good all over.

7. Develop your personality.

Are you grouchy, grumpy and generally morose? Whoa, you can't go through life with those. Get rid of the bad traits and habits that perpetually hamper your growth. And really, who wants a grouchy friend anyway?

8. Be confident.

Be able to stride to the other corner of the room and introduce yourself to people with that winning smile of yours. Just remember: be confident, not arrogant.

9. Practice control.

When angry, don't snap at anyone. Never throw a tantrum. Stay calm and collected. Be adult enough to take control of situation and transform your anger into something more productive and passive. As soon as people think your anger goes to volcanic proportions easily, they will find it hard to come to you.

10. Keep nurturing your relationships.

Your relationship with your family, friends and significant others is too precious that you must not neglect it whatever happens. Go out and have fun with them. Do things together. Happiness will never fly from your side as long as the people who matter the most are close to you.

In the end, using people for self-empowerment means becoming a better and more lovable person. It's a win-win situation: the people know they can turn to you anytime and vice versa.

What is Your Portable Power?

By Bonnie Marcus -

Author and five time CEO, Margaret Heffernan, was recently a guest on my radio show, Head over Heels Radio. Our discussion covered many interesting topics relative to women and business, but one that really got my attention was what Margaret refers to as “portable power”.

Portable power according to Heffernan is unique to each person. It is the sum total of your skills and experience, your professional and personal networks, and your financial independence. You own this power and take it with you wherever you go.

I have given this topic more thought and a couple of questions come to mind. How many women are actually aware of their portable power? If they were more connected to their portable power, would they behave differently?

Let’s try to do our own assessment. How would you rate your own portable power as defined by Margaret Heffernan?

1. Skills and Experience

List all your business and personal skills.

Business: i.e. computer skills, analytical skills, business acumen, selling skills, creativity, problem solving, team player, visionary

Personal: i.e. organized, tenacious, passionate, loving and nurturing, soulful, healthy, focused, outgoing

List your business and personal experiences

What has your experience in business taught you?

what companies have you worked for?

what industries?

what different types of positions?

what have you learned about running a department? your own business?

What  life lessons have you learned?

childhood experiences

relationships, children

community activity

living in different parts of the country, the world

travel

education, reading

2. Rate your personal and professional network strength

Who is in your personal network? Look at your email address book, Facebook and other social media friends, your cell phone contact list.

Estimate the number. I bet it’s a lot, right?

Your professional network consists of business colleagues from past as well as current positions, people you have met through networking events and online.

Count your social media connections as well.

Which is larger, your personal or professional network? Where is your strength?

3. Rate your financial independence

How much money is in your checking account? Your savings account?

What about your 401K? stock portfolio?

Do you own your own home?

Are you worried about paying the rent each month?

How long can you live comfortably without a pay check?

How do you rate your financial independence?

If  “portable power” is the sum total of all of this: your skills and experience, professional and personal networks, and financial independence, how powerful are you? Where do you need to devote more time and effort?

AND, will the knowledge of your “portable power” affect your decisions about whether or not to leave your job, start your own business, or leave a bad relationship?

Knowing how much power you have builds the self confidence to choose and make sound decisions. You take this power with you wherever you go. It’s who you are.

About: Bonnie:
Bonnie Marcus, M.Ed., CEC, is a Certified Executive Coach, motivational speaker, and radio show host. Her weekly show, Head Over Heels: Women's Business Radio, airs live on the VoiceAmerica Business channel Tuesdays 2pm Eastern. As the founder and principal of Women’s Success Coaching, Bonnie’s specialty is helping women in business achieve success and maximize their potential. She assists women with promoting themselves effectively in order to advance their careers and grow their businesses. Bonnie is well known for her motivational speaking and innovative workshops. She received a BA from Connecticut College and a M.Ed. from New York University. For additional information on Bonnie’s services, you can visit her website, http://www.womenssuccesscoaching.com Listen to Head Over Heels: Women's Business Radio http://www.voiceamerica.com/voiceamerica/vshow.aspx?sid=1612

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